Sincerely, Broken Girl.

I'm the Broken girl
who's had her dreams, hopes & ambitions, shattered to pieces;
The Broken girl
who expectantly held onto those pieces, only to then have them ripped from my hands.
I'm the Broken girl
who's lost what meant most to her;
The Broken girl
who asks " Where does this end Lord?!"
I'm the Broken girl
who gave it all but can expect nothing in return
The Broken girl
who falls so often while trying to follow in her Saviour's steps.
I am the Broken girl
who's afraid to look up and afraid to hope;
The Broken girl
whose tears fall not only from her eyes, but from her soul.

I am the Broken girl
but pity me not,
for I rest in the arms of an unbreakable God!
I am the Broken girl
but I will be mended;
For I've been privileged to go under the knife of the Great Surgeon,
fortunate to be in the palms of the Great Potter,
and blessed to be in the presence of the True Healer.

YES I am the Broken girl
but I'm not ashamed!
For these scars are proof of Healing;
they no longer reflect pain.

My heart's cry - FILL ME

Is it possible for me to drop everything I've been holding & just run to You?
Is it possible for me to just have You, in Your Purest sense?
That's what I want - You; in an undiluted form.
Where's this Enchanted place Lord, where I can go to find ONLY You?

You told me to let go of my dreams and hold onto You instead and since then I just can't get enough.
Desperate is how it sounds & desperate is exactly what I am.
Is it possible for me to get my fill Lord?
Is it possible that You'll give me as much of You as I desire?
Is it possible that You long for my embrace even more than I crave Yours?
You stand there with outstretched arms, eagerly waiting don't You? :)

Purify me Daddy and meet me in this Enchanted place.
Reveal Yourself to me, EVERY..single..day, so that no day becomes meaningless.
Meet me face-to-face that I may cling to Your presence.
I want eyes and a mind that are fixated on You.
I want to sit at Your feet like a child; in complete awe & fascination.
I want to sit with a heart wide open, that's ready to pour out all I've brought to offer & with cupped palms..ready to get my fill.

Fill this desperate little girl Abba, for her soul yearns for You!
Fill this desperate little girl Lord, and let it overflow!
Let it overflow like the Mighty waters, so that others will see
that You are her Source,
And with cupped palms, run desperately to get their fill.

It's all about You

After listening to the song ‘It’s all about You’ repeatedly, I could acknowledge my most well learnt lesson in my walk with Christ – it’s not about me & it never was . When I gave my life to Christ, that should’ve meant giving him my will, my desires, my hopes, my dreams, my talents & receiving His instead. I had difficulty doing that because I wanted to see my dreams become a reality; I wanted to help God plan; be His little assistant or something. I still had hopes of doing this n becoming that, getting this & experiencing that, simply because I saw it suitable and that’s normal right? Well…I’ve realized that doing that means that I’m still holding on to a part of my life instead of leaving it in the Potter’s hand. Thank God he’s released my grip from my own life & opened my eyes. Since then, everything started to make sense. I understood why things happened the way they did in my life and I began to understand what God’s ulterior motive is in the lives of all Christians. This song explains it well – “It’s all about You Jesus & all this is for You, for Your Glory & Your Fame.”

Everything God does in our lives is for HIS glory. We can now see why God allows both good and bad to happen 2 us- so that he can be glorified. God doesn’t allow anything in life to happen unless it will bring Him glory. You see, we don’t live for ourselves; our lives no longer belong to us (or so it should be). Good things don’t necessarily happen to u because you’re good & bad things don’t necessarily happen to u because you’re bad. When something good happens in your life, it either results in you giving God glory or it touches someone else and then God is glorified in their eyes. When things don’t go our way at 1st and then God takes us through it, who gets glorified in the end? Yup, that would be God.

I’ve completely given up my life. It didn’t happen in one day and it definitely was a humbling experience. I’ve gone from overwhelmingly questioning God, to complete surrender. I no longer ask “Why can’t I fully focus on the things I do best, if I’m good at them?”, “How can you take this dream from me when I’ve had it all my life?”, “Why would you ask for my best gift; what means most to me, if You blessed me with it?” God needs things to play out a particular way so that he can be honoured; so people can see his greatness. He needs us to see that his grace is sufficient. He needed me to see that He alone is enough.

Our talents, our strengths, our weaknesses, our ambitions, our friends, our future and our circumstance are not by chance. All that we do and all that we go through affects someone, somewhere and it all brings glory to God. So….
I'll obey him because I love him
I'll still have faith because I trust him
I'll offer my best sacrifice, because he's worth it.
He alone is God & I'll surrender to His ways

~. Back to the Basics .~

Open our eyes Lord that we may see how far we've drifted from Your will.
Father forgive us, for:

* we have questioned Your Word and Your will, and called it "intellect".

* we have aimlessly attended church, and called it "worship".

* we have kept silent when others boldly went against Your will, and called it "tolerance".

* we have polluted our lips with profanity, and called it "freedom of speech".

* we have exposed and wrongly embellished YOUR TEMPLE, and called it "fashion".

* we have accepted unholy or profane music and called it "diversity".

* we have tried to juggle being of this world and being spiritual Christians, and called it "versatility".

* we have blindly requested things from You, and called it "prayer".

* we have repeatedly praised ourselves instead of giving YOU the credit, and called it "self-esteem" or "confidence".

* we have been sexually immoral, and called it "human nature".

* we have ignored You, doubted You, cursed You, disobeyed You, and STILL we call it "Love".

Hear our cry oh Lord and forgive us, for we know what we have done.
Guide us as we return... to the BASICS OF LIFE.

(Actually written 2 years ago)